With the shops advertising the ever commercialised Valentines Day it can make you question your own social life and if it’s possible to even have one as well as raise a family on your own when so much time is spent with your children.
But a good support network of friends is vital for you and your children and may even lead to you finding someone special. Where do you start though? Especially if old friends have drifted through past relationships or you’ve moved to a new area.
Single With Kids offers opportunities for single parents to meet others through our forum, busy Facebook page, holidays and events. Run by single parents for single parents we know the challenges single parents face and offer fun and friendship for parents and kids. Just have a look at some of our testimonials.
1 Start at home
As clichéd as it sounds make some time for yourself. A key and often difficult point here is feeling confident to meet new people. It’s important to feel happy with yourself, so taking some time to list all the things you’ve achieved, your strengths and improving your self-respect will help.
Ask yourself is there anything that will stop you being able to get out and meet people? try to tackle each one, for example you may need to find a good babysitter.
Remember it’s also not just about you, as any change in routine or what you do will affect your kids too, so talk to them about doing more things together as a family and individually. You can explain how important friends are and that you all need your friends to talk to and have fun. Prepare them for having time apart from you.
Whilst it may feel that there is never any ‘spare’ time in busy family life, it’s important that you commit to social time and decide when that may be and where the kids will be at this time. For example Saturday mornings the kids may be busy with clubs and you may find you have time for yourself. As single parents we often have to rely on others and plans need to be flexible as things change but try to stick to regular times each week.
3 Finding friends
Spend time to get to know work colleagues, parents from school or from your kids clubs and groups. Local community events, such as school fetes, and community groups, are a good chance to meet people locally, check local noticeboards for anything coming up and look for any new classes in your area. Not only can you develop your social skills and build a local network of support but by joining in you’ll get introduced to new people extending your social circle. When you find people with common interests ask them about local groups maybe for fitness, hobbies or a study group. You’ll be learning new skills, building your confidence and making new friends. Single With Kids also offer Regional Boards on our forum where we encourage members to post about events such as local park meets, walks or find friends in their local area. The forum also provides an opportunity to chat anonymously about general things or important matters – a real lifeline to many members late at night!
4 What about dating?
Finding a date can be hard for anyone regardless of their situation! As you socialise more you’ll spend more time with particular friends, so look at what you enjoy about those friends and decide what you’d like in a partner. Remember to be realistic!
We all know someone who met their soulmate on internet dating sites and Single With Kids offer a dating site with helpful tips and advice. But meeting complete strangers can be daunting never mind difficult when you have limited time to socialise. Whilst Single With Kids isn’t a dating organisation we do offer the opportunity to meet other single parents at our events and holidays. This also gives you a chance to get to know other parents who understand the challenges of single parenting, in a relaxed environment where you are able to be yourself. At the very least you’ll meet lots of new friends but some of our members have found love through SWK and are now dating, married and some have added to their family with more babies.
Happy being Single? You aren’t alone! Many of our members enjoy their lives and are in no rush to start a new relationship. What matters is that you have support. Single With Kids is here to offer advice, friendship and lots of fun times…. Come and join in, there’s nothing to lose and lots to gain!