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Author Topic: Absent ex is controlling and wants joint custody.  (Read 2309 times)

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Offline pinkylala

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Absent ex is controlling and wants joint custody.
« on: March 26, 2016, 02:02:00 PM »
custody.
Advice please. My ex narccissist has not seen our children for 12 months. He loves to have control and is still writhing that I found out he was cheating 4 years ago for the full 6 years of marriage so that was the end.
He spent nearly 3 years trying to get me to sleep with him and again didn't like that I had control by saying no. 10 months ago he applied for mediation ( no idea why as I said he could see the children when he wanted)and every time I told the mediator I could do any day and would pay once he had I never heard back. Then after 4 attempts I get told that mediation will not go ahead. I applied to CMS 4 weeks ago as he wants to reduce payments ( first email I have received in 10 months). He knows he would have to pay me more as he admitted this then CMS contact me to say he wants DNA test as he is randomly disputing parentage of one child (3 weeks ago). Last week I receive court papers for a first hearing dispute resolution for going for joint custody. I have all proof in email form that I sent back in July basically leaving it open for him to call or contact or see the kids whenever he wanted and I also have his replies to these offers. Will the judge wonder what the heck he is doing and realise it is all to delay paying and avoid maintenance? He turned up at mine today and posted details of the DNA testing places through my door. Why would you dispute parentage if you wanted custody and vice versa. Our girl is his so he will have to pay eventually and he knows it. Is he just tying himself in knots?*

Offline Ms_wormwood

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Re: Absent ex is controlling and wants joint custody.
« Reply #1 on: March 28, 2016, 02:22:32 PM »
Ahhh, what an idiot. Just keep doing what you are doing, allowing access and keeping communication open. Either he will make the effort to see them or he won't. Just don't tie his payments to access in any way. They are separate issues and must remain separate (I assume the paying with regards mediation was paying for the mediation not for maintenance)
Onwards and upwards.

Offline pinkylala

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Re: Absent ex is controlling and wants joint custody.
« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2016, 07:33:21 PM »
Yes the comment on paying was in regards you I'm booking and paying for mediation his side first.
Revelation. Just found out I should be getting 250 more per month than I am getting. That explains why he wants joint custody. Hoping the courts will see straight through him.

 

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