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Author Topic: keep  (Read 5593 times)

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Offline WT4

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keep
« on: October 11, 2013, 11:54:56 PM »
Today ... my eldest made his first contribution to his keep

:)
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Offline Silky

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Re: keep
« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2013, 12:02:38 AM »
Today ... my eldest made his first contribution to his keep

:)

A bit of slave labour or an actual real pound sign contribution?

Either way it's a good move, just hope it lasts more than one or two weeks...

Silky x
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Offline WT4

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Re: keep
« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2013, 08:35:21 AM »
Oh, he's been pulling his weight with the fixing of cars, computers and other technical wizardry for some time.

We're talking proper £sd now.

Was quite a challenge working out a fair rate.
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Offline RunningGirl

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Re: keep
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2013, 10:27:59 AM »
Milestone!!!

Offline debs2702

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Re: keep
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2013, 02:48:28 PM »
The difficulty is them remembering like bills, its an event that should happen monthly and on a designated day.  Good luck with that!  I'm still trying to drum the point home! ???

But congrats, it is a milestone in their lives   ;D
« Last Edit: October 14, 2013, 02:52:38 PM by debs2702 »
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Offline Deborah43

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Re: keep
« Reply #5 on: October 14, 2013, 11:14:56 PM »
My mum had a system that I will instigate once it's appropriate.

First third of wages are kept by the earner.  They can do what they like with this amount.
Second third are put into a bank account/hidey hole under the bed by the earner.  They are not allowed to access this under any circumstances.
Last third are given by the earner to the house-holder/parent as "keep".

Any other skills and talents (consideration, compassion, cooking, mechanics, negotiation, baby-sitting, cleaning, other appropriate skills) are offered/given freely between all members of the household.

On leaving the family nest the young fledgling is allowed to take what they have accumulated/saved/kept in the hidey hole and then where possible they are given the bulk of what they offered up as "keep" as a Brucie Bonus.  The point of the exercise?  To offer the youngster a chance to flex their own muscles in the realm of budgeting, to get over feeling annoyed that they have had to contribute (a lá rent and bills), to have saved some money with restraint and in their own right, and to get a bonus that was unexpected and ultimately useful.
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Offline Tulip

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Re: keep
« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2013, 05:45:36 PM »
I know we are all different but the last post has blown me away. I'm all for adult kids paying their bit of keep but the other bits shock me. Whilst it is nice to suggest to your grown up kids that saving is a good idea, you have no right to tell another working adult what they can and can't do with their earnings. As for when they leave the family home they are allowed to take their savings with them - really??? I have three kids in their 20's and would never had told them exactly what they could and couldn't do with their money and I wouldn't allow them to tell me what I should do with my hard earned money. I've just read back my post and it seems a tad harsh. Not meant to be in any way just curious as to what others think.

Offline Deborah43

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Re: keep
« Reply #7 on: October 15, 2013, 08:10:35 PM »
At 16, with a weekend job, I wasn't an adult I was a young person who still needed to learn how to manage money.  It did me no harm at all and in fact has stood me in good stead and it's a skill I hope to pass on.  Live in my house, play by my rules.  Once out on your own you can do as you please.
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."

Offline scatily

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Re: keep
« Reply #8 on: October 15, 2013, 11:01:36 PM »
My parents didn't dictate how I spent my money but did charge me £60 a month once I earnt £500 a month in full time employment aged 18 post college. I was a natural saver though  ;D. While I was working for 'pocket money' on a saturday I didn't contribute but funded my own social life.

When I left home at 21 to buy my own shared ownership flat I was surprised to be given all my £60's a month back, it was a fair bit and really helped to furnish it. I know I was very lucky though and not all parent/s are able to do this. I hope I will for J, time will tell!

Offline Tulip

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Re: keep
« Reply #9 on: October 15, 2013, 11:23:21 PM »
I had to pay keep once I had started full time work. I too asked a bit of keep off my kids once they were in full time work.  I think it's fair enough they pay their way. That said, I believe it's wrong to 'make' money from your kids. The amount asked for should be proportionate to the cost of their food plus a bit extra for electric etc. 

Agree that 16 is not an adult but the post made reference to them not being allowed to touch the savings under any circumstance until they left home which, for most would take them well into adulthood. 

Offline Sqizzer

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Re: keep
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2013, 02:08:12 AM »
Ignorant foreigner asking what exactly is the definition of a 'keep'
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Offline WT4

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Re: keep
« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2013, 04:40:04 AM »
what exactly is the definition of a 'keep'

Not sure it has a precise definition - keep is the costs associated with living, food on the table, roof overhead, laundry services, telephone & broadband etc.

How it is calculated will vary from family to family but when a child leaves full time education they are expected to make a financial contribution to the costs of running the home they live in.

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Offline Sqizzer

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Re: keep
« Reply #12 on: October 16, 2013, 01:14:51 PM »
Ah thank you. I originally thought you were talking about a dowry type thing but then further comments confused me
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Offline Phil

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Re: keep
« Reply #13 on: May 26, 2016, 07:22:41 PM »
I've got to say I've never charged the kids anything for living with me when they started working. All I asked them to do was save the money they would have paid as I think its hard enough for kids to get on the housing ladder as it is. As my oldest is looking at moving in with his girlfriend in the near future the money he has saved (I hope) will go some way towards a deposit or getting furniture stuff for the house
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Offline CB2

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Re: keep
« Reply #14 on: May 26, 2016, 07:40:48 PM »
I am not at this stage yet, he is still at school, but now thinking about getting a weekend/summer job.  I will encourage him to save some of this money.

Not until he works full time would I think of him giving me his "Keep" but I think it is important they realise that their wage has to cover all their expenses so when they move out it is not suddenly a shock.

That said I would save that money and give it to him when he moves out and hopefully buys or even rents his first home.
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Offline monkeys mom

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Re: keep
« Reply #15 on: May 26, 2016, 07:56:38 PM »
The shock of realising how the 'kids' I met on trips have now grown up aside.... I agree that encouraging money management is part of parenting.

It's nigh on impossible for kids to get a foot on the property ladder unless they have substantial savings so teaching how to regularly save and the 'value' of money as well as the cost of running a home is an important skill x
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Offline Silky

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Re: keep
« Reply #16 on: May 26, 2016, 08:02:32 PM »
Money management...hm.  My oldest is skipping a step and learning how to pay people to work for her - she offered her sister £5 to take her turn to do the dishes recently.  Laziness is obviously a greater driver than any material possessions, I'm not entirely sure if I can be proud of that :-)

Silky x
A positive mental attitude may not solve all your problems but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort"

Offline CB2

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Re: keep
« Reply #17 on: May 26, 2016, 08:07:50 PM »
C loves saving money and is not over keen on spending his money but loves spending mine.

I found out the other day that he has been buying sweets off people at break and then selling it on at lunchtime for a higher price......... as I work in school I am hoping this little enterprise stays firmly under wraps.
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Offline oldbag

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Re: keep
« Reply #18 on: May 29, 2016, 08:34:00 PM »
My son regularly contributes to his keep, he breaks something most week and has to um pay for it.. his Christmas money has been spent on many a repair.  Is he learning from this? Not convinced, money doesn't mean much to him because his dad buys everything he needs/wants.
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Offline Silky

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Re: keep
« Reply #19 on: May 31, 2016, 08:45:10 AM »
I have a bit of this in that my kids get money off relatives for birthdays and Christmas so they always seem to have some in a pot somewhere (unlike me!).  It means they're never particularly bothered about it. I've offered my oldest some work on a number of occasions but she's not interested - I'd have bitten hands off at her age!

Silky x
A positive mental attitude may not solve all your problems but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort"

Offline oldbag

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Re: keep
« Reply #20 on: May 31, 2016, 08:19:41 PM »
I have a bit of this in that my kids get money off relatives for birthdays and Christmas so they always seem to have some in a pot somewhere (unlike me!).  It means they're never particularly bothered about it. I've offered my oldest some work on a number of occasions but she's not interested - I'd have bitten hands off at her age!

Silky x

Same here,  My son occasionally would ask before he got his own bank acct and all xmas money went into it, and now he just uses that to pay direct for his virtual games on line, it won't let him over draw so I guess I will know when he runs out. I don't give him pocket money but his dad does i believe. I used to mow the lawn and do all kinds of jobs for 10-20p !
I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I'm not!!!!

 

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